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Thursday, July 08, 2004
I fell asleep last night around 5 or 6pm and slept straight through till 5am this morning. I must have needed it. Mrs. Hippy should have woken my lazy ass up, but she didn't. Bet she's not too pleased with this either.
What can I do? I've overdone it. I didn't even finish my last night of work, I only got through about a third of the night before I had to leave. I wasn't sick, or tired, I could have finished it, but I got some bad news.
The news was partially about my father and in part about my younger brother. I won't go into too much detail here and now, but lets just say my family problems are worsening and leave it at that for now.
At this point I am more detached from it all than ever; it's all more abstract than I could have ever hoped for or expected. The distance between me and the rest of my family has never been greater than it is right now. I am really and truly out of the game now.
I know this is all vague, but it is suprisingly liberating, knowing that it is finished for me.
I did hear from my mother a couple of days ago. She didn't have all that much to say, just that my father "sounds good" on phone when she speaks to him. Maybe he puts whatever strength he has left into sounding strong on the phone for 2 minutes once or twice a day. That's my interpretation of it. My family always opts for hiding the truth, especially when it is bad news. That wouldn't stop now, if anything it would become even more imperative.
My mother then handed the phone to one of her home-help people, the one who speaks English. She told me she was trying to organise getting my mother to the hospital to visit my father, which would be great, but there was some nonsense with the wheel-chair equipped van. Seems it was in the garage being repaired and loaner van is not capable of taking a wheelchair. Oh well it was a good idea.
She tried to tell me lots of other things, but I've decided it's best to live without the minutiae. The small details don't seem to add much for me. She offered to stay in touch with me, but I think it's best to know as little as possible. I listened to her without really taking any of it in. I didn't ask a single question.
When the call comes, it comes, and it will come. I don't need to know anything else until then.
Remember, the northlondonhippy is mainly about making life easier, yours and mine. Right now, especially mine.
I need to apply this philosophy to work as well, and soon. I've done too much already this month and while the remainder of July is not as bad, it is steady. I'm going to ease back in August, which is bad news for the 2nd choice employers, I'm not going to take on any work there in August. I feel like canceling the ones I've got in July, and it's only 3 more shifts anyway.
To be honest, I am really getting pissed off with employer number 2. Time for a hippy whinge: They still haven't paid me for May. That's nearly 7 weeks since I invoiced without any joy. It's not a huge amount of money, but it is the difference between staying in the black and going overdrawn. I am getting really fucked off.
I went to see the accountants on Monday. Turns out my invoice was sitting in an in-basket, already approved and coded, and waiting to be paid. No reason was given as to why it was not dealt with, nor was an apology offered. I confirmed my bank details and was promised that the money would be put directly in my account asap. It's still not there. I am going to throw a major wobbly today if when I check my balance, I don't see it.
To put this in perspective, employer number one (and soon to be only) paid my first invoice in 2 and 1/2 weeks, the second in less than 2 weeks. No muss, no fuss, quickly, efficiently and accurately. I like it!
This is probably become the major factor in my decision to put an end to employer number 2. The real question is whether or not I do the 3 shifts there this month. My current thinking is if they have not paid me by Friday, I am going to cancel those 3 shifts, invoice for the couple I've already done there and close that chapter of my freelance existence. Sounds like a plan to me.
Making life simple, that's my motto. Well one of them anyway.