VISIT THE HIPPY'S NEW SITE: Spend some time chilling out with the hippy...He used to be "the most shroomtastic stoner on the internet!" until the UK banned fresh magic mushrooms. He's still "the biggest internet celebrity you've never heard of!" He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think...he'll make you wish you were a hippy too!

Saturday, December 04, 2004

This hippy is awake already, been up about an hour actually. I wish I could have slept a bit more, but I'll make do with what I've had. I'll have to, I've got no choice.

The above paragraph is all I wrote before heading to the kitchen for a fresh cup of hippycoffee and a blueberry muffin. Clearly I'm back now, though I expect you wouldn't have even noticed my absence.

That's the thing about blogging, the immediacy of it. Very often I write in the present tense. I am right now blah blah blah.

Like right now, I'm sipping my coffee and chomping on my muffin. When you actually read this though, I won't be doing either. I could be doing anything away from my PC.

I've finished the muffin and just lit a cigarette. Coffee and cigarettes go together really well. I wish I didn't enjoy tobacco quite so much. I'm happy to be a staunch advocate of weed and shrooms, but kids, I can't recommend smoking cigarettes! Tobacco is really bad for you, if you don't smoke, don't start. And if you already smoke, you need to quit, me included!

My mother (a former smoker and current stroke survivour) used to have an expression that I've heard a million times. She used to say "Do as I say, not as I do." She used to tell me not to smoke while puffing on a Salem Light, so the irony of me telling you not to smoke while I'm inhaling deeply on one is not lost on me.

I'm tentatively planning on giving up early in the New Year. For real. The NHS offers all sorts of help and support, so this hippy will be checking it out. If you live in the UK, you could take advantage of this as well. If you live elsewhere, well, I don't have a clue who you can turn to, so ask your private doctor if he can recommend something that is right for you. Christ I sound like one of those ads on American TV!

I'll still smoke weed, or rather my plan is to use the vapouriser I bought a while back. I haven't really mentioned it since I bought it, because I tried it once and was not blown over by it. I need to make sure I'm using it correctly.

The idea behind a vapouriser is simple, the good bits in weed burn at a lower temp than the bad bits, like the tar and stuff. A vapouriser heats the weed to the point that the active ingredients turn to vapour, leaving the crap untouched. In theory, it sounds great, maybe I just need to get used to it, since they say it is a different high from smoking it. We'll see.

Back again, this time I went into the kitchen with one of my cats, to give him a little extra food. My cats are spoiled, even if there is food in their bowl, they like me to top it up for them. It's about the attention, more than anything else. They eat dry food, so it's not a problem. I think they like the fact that when they ask me for food, I get up and respond. Sometimes when the bowl is particularly full, I mime adding more and they are just as happy. Cats are cool and I'm cool for cats, just like the Squeeze song.

I've just lit another spliff, my second of the day. I've been awake for nearly 90 minutes. Way-hey...

I love being high. To me, I just feel normal when I'm stoned. I'm a weed addict. I've been one since I was 18 years old. I've smoked just about every day since then. The days I didn't, well, that was only because I couldn't find any, never by choice. These days, I try to make sure I never run out. It's not as easy as it sounds.

If only the UK would adopt more sensible laws regarding cannabis, life would be so much better. Making it class "C" was a big step in the right direction, but it didn't go far enough. You only need to visit the Netherlands to see what I mean.

Ah the Netherlands, Holland to some of you, dope capital of Europe. If you smoke weed, there is no place cooler. You can order a coffee and some weed in a coffeeshop, sit down, sip your coffee and smoke your gear like a normal person! Once you've tasted this concept, seen the sense, experienced the "everydayness" of it, you'll realise just how wrong other countries are with their laws.

I'd like to think that the UK will continue to become more liberal. They even say the Liberal Democrats (the third political party here in the UK, after Blair's New Labour & the Tories) are gaining in popularity. They are the sensible sort that advocates decriminalisation and possible legalisation. They are the gitchiest, vote for them!

The postman just put a bunch of junkmail bollocks through my letterbox. Naturally I could only know that because I went and checked.

Are you enjoying these little asides into my activities?

I'm just sitting here in a robe, it's blue and made of towelly material. I'd like to have a shower, but Mrs. H is still sleeping. She hasn't been feeling very well lately, so its good she's getting the extra rest. My shower probably wouldn't disturb her, but I don't want to take the chance. I'll get clean later.

Mrs. Hippy is planning on visiting relatives tomorrow, so it’s looking good for my overdue shrooming session. Since she doesn’t join me on shroom voyages, I try to spare her the sight of me all twisted up and gurning like a shroom loon. I’ll blog as much of the experience as I can, but if I get the dosage high enough, typing won’t be possible and that’s my true aim!

I'm stiff puffing on my spliff, one of my every day ones, made from a single skin, king-sized red Rizla. It's not a special occasion, so it's not a special spliff. It keeps going out when I put it down to type, but I've got a lighter, so re-igniting it ain't no hardship for this hippy.

The smoke is sweet and pungent, it's filled with a blend of dope with a little tobacco, to make it burn more evenly. I love the way it fills my lungs and my brain. Mmmmmmmmmmmmm good.

Perhaps I glorify drug use a bit too much. Hollywood is often accused of doing just that. I'm just sharing my experiences with you in an honest way. I tell you about the downside as well as the up. Haven't you read anything I've written about cocaine?

Human beings have been indulging in various intoxicants for thousands of years. It's something we seek out, something we must clearly require. Even when you are a kid, you probably have achieved an altered state of consciousness, without realising that’s what you are doing. I bet you spun around like a dervish, until you couldn't anymore and then you collapsed on the floor, feeling dizzy, with your head spinning. That's a way to reach an altered state without the ingesting anything.

Whether its cannabis, alcohol, magic mushrooms, peyote, you name it, people have always sought out different ways to get off their faces. Is it any wonder that science didn't get in on the act as well, with speed and LSD and Prozac and all the other synthesised drugs that mess with your head. Better living through chemistry, as they used to say.

My main drugs of choice, shrooms and weed, are natural. They both just grow, without too much help from man. Those of you who are religious would say they are gifts from God (or the gods) there to be enjoyed and consumed by man, since they are so natural. I don't see anything wrong partaking in both of them, as long as I'm sensible.

Again, I'm not going to bullshit you. All drugs have risks, especially tobacco and alcohol, which are the biggest killer drugs of them all. But it's my body and mind and I should be able to do what I want with them.

Shrooms can make you go crazy IF you have a propensity in that direction anyway. If you are borderline psychotic, then shrooms are not for you as they will send you across that border without a visa. That doesn't mean everyone who takes them will go crazy, but a minority of people (who probably would have ended up loony anyway) might.

There was another cannabis study released this week, which tried to make a strong link between smoking dope and psychosis in teenagers of a certain age. It would seem to this hippy, that those who went crazy from weed, did so because they were predisposed to it. All the dope did is speed up something that was already there anyway. Again, in a relative minority of people.

Ok, there's my drugs of choice covered; now what about booze? Booze is the same, if you have an inclination towards any sort of problem, be it depression or neurosis or psychosis, alcohol can bring it out in you. It does lower inhibitions, so it does make sense. It also jives that if you tend towards violence and aggression, liquor is quicker on those qualities as well. Check out any city centre on a Saturday night, booze is really a bad drug...

But no one is trying to ban booze!

They experimented with it the early days of the last century in America and look where it got them? Nowhere. I take that back, it more than helped create something we like to call the mafia. Yes, organised crime in America has its roots in prohibition. Doesn't everyone know that already?

And what has drug prohibition spawned? Colombian drug cartels, crack houses, meth labs and the like. There are countries whose entire economies are based on the export of drugs, to countries like the one you probably live in. Colombia's biggest export is coke; Afghanistan's is opium/heroin. Where do they send most of it? To Europe and America, of course.

The war on drugs is a joke and a waste of time. How does anyone think all of those drugs get moved around the world? Corruption, money is a strong persuader. People in authority must be turning a blind eye to allow the scope of smuggling that goes on.

Legalise everything, tax it, sell it in shops for a reasonable price, especially crack and smack! Try it, then see if your car stereo gets stolen. Make drugs affordable and watch many property crimes disappear. Go on, just a little experiment for the hippy, if I'm right, you can vote me king.

Look, the war on drugs started in America under Reagan, over 20 years ago. There are more drugs available at lower prices than ever before. That's one effective war, eh? If that's their definition of success, is it any wonder why they think things in Iraq are going so well!

It's Saturday morning and I'm just one crazeeee hippy in fabulous north London. I'm not going to change the world, no matter how much drivel I write.
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