VISIT THE HIPPY'S NEW SITE: www.northlondonhippy.com Spend some time chilling out with the hippy...He used to be "the most shroomtastic stoner on the internet!" until the UK banned fresh magic mushrooms. He's still "the biggest internet celebrity you've never heard of!" He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think...he'll make you wish you were a hippy too!

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Hey ho hippyfans!

It's a brand new year and a brand new entry from yours truly, the northlondonhippy! How exciting for you!

Not really, but I can dream. Or maybe you do excited every time I update this site. If that's the case, you really need to get out more.

I'm the only one that gets excited by this page, especially on the 2nd of January at 11:59am north London time, because that is the exact moment I got my one-thousandth hit!

Hit number 1000 was 36 hours later than I had hoped, so fucking what? I made the magic 1000 number! Yippppeeee for the hippy! Yippppeee for blogging! Yipppeeee for one-thousand unique page impressions!!!

I may not be up there with the more popular porn sites and Google, but it is by no means a small achievement for this one crazeeee hippy in north London. I'm sitting here, puffing on a Marlboro Light, feeling quite pleased with myself actually. I might even do a little hippyhappydance.

And no, I won't be posting any stills or video of said hippydance. Somethings are better left unseen, even by the most die-hard of hippyfans.

I wish I could offer some sort of prize to the lucky 1000th visitor, but alas, I can't. What I can do is tell you a bit about them, courtesy of www.sitemeter.com

The 1000th visitor:
- Uses AOL to connect to the internet
- Lives somewhere in the US of A
- Uses Windows XP
- Uses Internet Explorer 6.0
- Found the hippy via a search on AOL.com
- Was searching for "44GG"

What?

"44GG" is a bra size, quite a large one actually. Here's a hippysecret: "44GG" is the latest hippysearch term that allows you to stumble into me, See for yourself HERE and HERE.

But hippy, why are you writing about bra sizes, especially for overly-endowed women? Simple, a while back, I posted a short story I wrote about a woman named "MIRIAM" and she describes herself as having a rack that size. So because of this work of some literary merit (you be the judge of that!), I'm now getting hits from the net-perv brigade.

I don't care what kind of hits I get, a perv-hit is just as good as any other type. I'm not one to discriminate on the basis of anything, be it race, religion or an interest in babes with big tits!


Here are some of the other search terms that accidentally get you to me:
- "vapureyes vaporiser" (I bought one and have mentioned it in the blog)
- "
orgries" (sic: orgies - mentioned once while blogging on shrooms, for pervs who can't spell)
- "dysfunctional, the new normal" (I don't think I originated this one, but I get lots of people finding me with it)
- "are you digging on me?" (plus other variations. I wrote about Joss Stone once, actually slagged her off a bit, humourously. This one comes up a lot. Sorry, Joss, I don't really dislike you. Actually I think you have a wicked voice and are kinda cute in a youthful way. Drop by north London sometime and I'll get you stoneD. All I'll need to do is add a "D" to your surname!)

Plus there are others, but the above four terms are the most common ones. Big weirdness really.

Oh and I left off probably the most common term of all and that is "shrooms". Since I am the "most shroomtastic stoner on the internet" it only makes sense that I can be be found through various variations on terms for magic mushrooms, slang and proper latin names as well.


And speaking of shrooms, I had a right blast on Sunday with my Colombian p.cubes! I took them around 1:15pm and by 3pm I was lost in the world of the mushroom god. It was quite a good trip, but then that is always true. They seemed to be a bit more visual than Mexicans, so perhaps this hippy is wrong and I need to re-evaluate my views on the different effects of different strains. More research is undoubtedly required!

I had closed-eye visuals for the first time ever. What that means in real terms is that I could see psychedelic shapes when I shut my eyes, colourful blobs pulsating iin my head like a multi-coloured lava lamp. Very cool indeed.

I was able to get lost in the music video channels for several hours. Green Day, wow, I'm very impressed, likewise Blink 182. Both bands seemed to have reached a maturity with their latest releases, so please give them both your maximum respect. I also saw a video by the Killers, who impressed me quite a bit, I'll need to keep an eye out for them. There was plenty more that was good as well, but I was on drugs, so don't expect me to remember everything!

All in all it was a good trip, with the usual smooth come up and gentle comedown I've grown to expect with my favourite all natural and legal high! Damn you, UK government for even considering a ban on the sale of fresh, magic mushrooms. This might be the year they piss all over our party. If they really do it, it will be a sad day for this hippy, I can tell you that for nothing.

Could 2005 be the year the northlondonhippy breaks mainstream? Will 1000 hits in 6 months seem like nothing once I break through to the traditional media. It still remains only a matter of time before someone, somewhere picks up on what the hippy is all about. One mention in a newspaper, or on an influential website and this hippy could suddenly see an influx of visitors that would make my little hit counter go crazeeeee. Dare I dream that this is possible?

Oh yes, more than possible. This hippy has plans, big plans, to promote this blog in ways that will impress and astound you. I shouldn't even mention this, so early on, but I started something quietly several weeks ago, which I am confident will garner the hippy some much craved attention. Shhhhh! I've already said too much. It's a big secret, but when the time is right, I'll reveal all. For now, it's just between my mushroom god and me!

And on that mysterious note my dear hippyfans, I bid you adieu. Parting is always such a sweet sorrow.
Comments: Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?