VISIT THE HIPPY'S NEW SITE: Spend some time chilling out with the hippy...He used to be "the most shroomtastic stoner on the internet!" until the UK banned fresh magic mushrooms. He's still "the biggest internet celebrity you've never heard of!" He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think...he'll make you wish you were a hippy too!

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Right now, I’m having more fun than you. That’s ok, because I have more fun than anyone!

I’m at work, stone-cold sober and not that busy. It’s a fiddly night already and I’m not even half way through my shift. Roll on 7:30am, which is when I start my run of about 60 hours outside of this place, before I return on Thursday night. Don’t envy me for my glamorous media lifestyle, envy me because I’m hung like a horse and a lot more fun to ride! Giddiyap fuckers!

I overslept again tonight. Trust me, there’s nothing worse than oversleeping for a nightshift. It really fucks you up for the entire evening. I haven’t been very clever tonight either, which is very unlike me.

For starters, when I trimmed my beard this evening, which was long overdue, I neglected to set the length thingy correctly, which meant I looked up in the mirror and half my beard was suddenly skin. Ut oh. Damage limitation means I now have quite a wanky goatee beard. Sometimes this hippy is a twat.

I still managed to leave earlier than normal for the office, which I thought was essential following my horrendous drive on Sunday night. Doh! The traffic was ridiculously light, which was totally unexpected, especially for a weeknight. I was really fucking early for work. Ut oh.

I’m still quite tired, I haven’t caught up yet from my lack of sleep on Friday and Saturday. I’ll probably sleep all day tomorrow, once I’ve done a few things around the house. Cleaning things, very dull. What I would like to do is take some drugs tomorrow night, perhaps the last of my shroomies. If I can get everything I need done in the morning and have a nice long nap, that might happen.

I can’t remember the last time I shroomed, it’s been months and months I think. And you wonder why I’m not shroomtastic anymore!

Don’t worry, I haven’t purchased anymore, not since they were foolishly reclassified. It’s just a tiny bit I have left over, which is probably chemically inert by now anyway. We’ll see. All I need to do is skip dinner and I can check them out. If they’re duds, I’ll just order a pizza or some of my favourite Malaysian take-away. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Food is not a substitute for drugs, but it would still be nice.

Other than that, I’ve got no real plans for my 60 hours off. Mrs. H is back on Weds evening, which will be cool. I’m going to geek out with my iBook.

I can’t recall if I mentioned that it arrived on Friday afternoon, about 3 hours before I had to leave for work. Typical Apple, it was set up and online in about 3 mins. Fuck Microsoft and Windows, OS X is the only way to go.

The laptop is lovely, small, easy to use and very cool. I’ve ordered an additional 1gb of RAM, which should arrive on Tuesday. I’m also going to order one of THESE. I’ve found a company in the UK with the 12” version in stock. A mate of mine at work has one for his PowerBook and swears by it. As well as keeping the computer cool by dissipating the heat, it also makes it easier to use the laptop when you’re sprawled out on the sofa. And it doubles as a desk stand too! I’m looking forward to getting one.

Beyond that exciting geek news, life for me this week should be pleasingly dull. Of course, if you’re in London and would like to entertain me on Tuesday or Wednesday this week, I’m always open to offers of hard drugs and casual sex. Ideally, a combination of both would sort me right out, but then that’s probably true of every single adult on the planet! Have fun, fuckers!
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