VISIT THE HIPPY'S NEW SITE: Spend some time chilling out with the hippy...He used to be "the most shroomtastic stoner on the internet!" until the UK banned fresh magic mushrooms. He's still "the biggest internet celebrity you've never heard of!" He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think...he'll make you wish you were a hippy too!

Thursday, September 29, 2005

How about a yipppeee and a yo? I’m in that kind of mood.

Right here, right now, it’s 5:35am and I’m wide awake. I’m also at work, where I will remain for just under 2 more hours. To say I’ve had a dull night would be an understatement of enormous proportions. If it was any deader here, I’d have to turn the aircon way down, just to prevent our corpses from rotting.

Now there’s a pretty mental image.

I’m in a better mood tonight, but that’s down to getting a reasonable amount of sleep on Wednesday and eating a decent meal this evening. I even ate some green, crispy stuff which you might know by the name of “lettuce”. I think it’s a vegetable, but I’m not sure. I don’t eat too many green things.

Mainly, just the green M&Ms…and you know what they do to you, don’t you? They make you horny. Me so horny, me love you long time!

Ok, so far this is just stream of consciousness drivel. There’s a reason for that. I’ve got nothing planned for this entry. I’m just going to babble like a motherfucker and hope some of my genius somehow seeps out.

For a dyed in the wool pessimist, I sure do sound optimistic sometimes!

They say it’s difficult to conceal genius, but I’ve managed to pull it off for over 42 fun-filled years. No one I know has even the slightest suspicion that I’m even remotely clever. It’s easier to hide than you think.


So are we having fun yet? Have I amused, entertained or informed you? No. Ok, then I’ll just keep writing until I do, dammit!

No hippylinks tonight. I’ve been through the newspapers and they were all pretty dull. There’s a report in today’s Times that says Osama bin Laden applied for political asylum here in Blighty in the mid-90s, but so what? He didn’t get it, but lots of other mad mullahs did. They’re rounding them all up these days and deporting, or so it seems. Again, so what?

The Guardian’s lead is a vague warning from some cop, who says Londoners should expect another terrorist attack. Of course, he doesn’t know when, where or by whom, so it’s pretty meaningless as well.

The sky may fall on your head. I don’t know when or where or who will cause it, but it might happen. And I might win the lottery, if I can pick those six lucky numbers the same time the funny machine with the numbered ping-pong balls does.

For fuck’s sake, stop scaring us. We know we’re all going to hell in a handbasket, do we need constant reminding.

Like that NASA study this week, which says that the arctic ice caps are melting at an alarming rate. So what? Do we really need to know this?

Nothing lasts forever kids, especially not a race as self-destructive as us human beings. We’re using up all the resources of the planet as quickly as we can and only leaving a mess in our wake.

So fucking what? Are we so great that we need preserving? I very much think not.

Ok, so I’ve informed you a little. Now we’re getting somewhere. And you know, I’m always entertaining and amusing…certainly something I said has made you laugh? Maybe I should post a photo of myself…that would get you giggling!

As if! I’m anonymous forever. This is one hippy who’s happy to hide behind his secret internet identity!

Enough already, hippy. Don’t you dare come back until you have something important to say!

You fuckers could be in for one long-assed wait!
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