VISIT THE HIPPY'S NEW SITE: www.northlondonhippy.com Spend some time chilling out with the hippy...He used to be "the most shroomtastic stoner on the internet!" until the UK banned fresh magic mushrooms. He's still "the biggest internet celebrity you've never heard of!" He'll make you laugh, he'll make you think...he'll make you wish you were a hippy too!

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Yep, I’m still here. Reports of my internet death have been greatly exaggerated.

I’m still vacillating with regards to my continued participation in this particular blog.

I don’t know what I’m going to do yet. I’d like to reignite my blogging fire, but I don’t know how. Part of me feels like I’ve hit a brick wall.

I do think of things to write about, but they still tend to come at awkward times, like when I’m drifting off to sleep. That’s no good to anyone!

Have I lost my enthusiasm? Have I lost my spark? Am I a hippy has-been? Or a never-was?

I don’t have the answers either. I can barely think of the questions.

Sometimes, life is like this, where you don’t know if you’re coming or going…

That makes me think of an old joke….

Why did god make piss yellow and semen white?

So you could always tell whether you’re coming or going!

Did ya get it? Did ya?

Nevermind.

Has it really come to this? Old, recycled jokes that I first heard as a teenager? Oh dear.

Remember when this blog was about drugs and blowjobs? Those were the days!

I tried the “Pulsate Chill Pill” last weekend and I was so underwhelmed by them that I forgot to post my review.

I took one, followed by a second around 2 hours later. Yes, they had an effect, but I wasn’t that impressed. I can tell you right now, I prefer the P.E.P pills much more. "Twisted" are my favourites!

Also, the “Pulsate Chill Pill” is more expensive than P.E.P.s…Pulsates cost a fiver a tab, while P.E.P. pills cost a fiver for two. Max recommended dose for both is 3 pills, so the P.E.P.s are much more cost effective.

Of course, proper MDMA “E’s” allegedly sell for 50p a pop in some parts of the UK, so going the legal route, while safer, is much more expensive. Since I don’t do proper E’s anymore, there my only option.

Again, the magic ingredient is piperazine which is an extract of good old black pepper. That’s right, the stuff you put on food that can make you sneeze! Ain’t modern chemistry grand!

Ok, so I thought of something to say. I know lots of people use this blog as a reference for all things drug related, so I guess I’m providing a public service to the masses!

Why doesn’t someone hire me to be their drug correspondent? I’d love my own column in the Guardian or a live radio call in show. Is anyone brave enough to do this? Has anyone got the balls to give me some airtime? I fucking doubt it! Creative thinking and the media don’t go together very well.

I’ll tell you something for nothing, fuckers. I’d get rocking ratings, especially if I got an overnight time slot on the radio. I’m a night person anyway and I’d be able to attract all the really weird people and just imagine the phone-ins!

“Hello caller, what the fuck have you got to say?” says the hippy.

Caller: “I’m really high!”

Hippy: “Me too!”

Hippy & caller: “Yipppeee!”

It would be award winning radio! I’d be rich, I’d be famous and I’d being getting blown by every hot woman in Britain!

So if you’re a highflying programme director on a London-based radio station, look no further than me for the next big thing in broadcasting! You’ll go down in history as the genius who discovered the northlondonhippy!
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